The greatest & most important adventure of our lives is discovering who we really are.
Yet, so many of us walk around either not really knowing or listening to this awful inner critic that gives us all the wrong ideas about ourselves. We mistakenly think of self-understanding as self-indulgence, & we carry on without asking the most important question we’ll ever ask ourselves: Who am I really?
So I ask…What is it you plan to do with your one wild & precious life???
“When I discover who I am, I’ll be free.” — Ralph Ellison
In order to become the best version of yourself & bring your value to the world (the best partner, parent etc.), we first need to know who we are, what we value & how we can offer that value to the world around us.
This personal journey AKA, spiritual awakening usually involves breaking down, shedding layers that do not serve us in our lives & don’t reflect who we really are.
And yet, it also involves a tremendous act of building up – recognizing who we want to be & passionately going about fulfilling our unique destiny – whatever that may be.
Waking up is recognizing our personal power, yet being open & vulnerable to our experiences. It isn’t something to fear or avoid, berating ourselves along the way, but rather something to seek out with the curiosity & compassion we would have toward a fascinating new friend. It’s time we started giving ourselves the same compassion & empathy we give to others.
If you’ve been feeling stuck, if you don’t know your purpose, if you don’t know who you are or where you stand in the world, if you’ve been trying so desperately hard to change but don’t know where to start then this is for you!
These stepping stones will lead you onto the right path. The path to YOUR self discovery. A path that will bring you the answers you’ve been trying so hard to seek.
Step One: Make Friends With Your Past!
In order to uncover who we are & why we act the way we do, we have to know our own story. Being brave & willing to explore our past is an important stepping stone on the road to understanding ourselves & becoming who we want to be. The attitudes & environments we grew up in play a heavy part on how we act as adults! Even though there is NO way we will be like our mother or father, (after all they were our teachers).
Painful early life experiences often determine how we define & defend ourselves, our patterns & beliefs.
Just observe how you feel towards your parents, siblings & family members today.
- How do they make you feel?
- What is the most prominent memory as a child?
- What happened?
Go back as far as you remember & just observe.
These become our patterns.
Now dig a little deeper.
- How did you feel about yourself at that moment?
- What story did you tell yourself?
- Who did you begin believing you are?
- Did you feel guilt? Distrust? Anger because you felt unsafe?
These become our beliefs! How we process experience, emotions & thoughts that become beliefs.
Dig as deep as you can. Pain has many layers, try to get to the core so you can transcend this energy.
Now use this information in your current life.
- How do certain people make you feel?
- What triggers this reaction?
- Can you identify the pattern?
- Can you identify the belief?
Once you have this valuable information you can change the script at any time! In the moment you experience it you can change it & begin writing a new story with new patterns & new beliefs.
Knowing what we want is fundamental to finding ourselves. Recognizing our wants & desires helps us realize who we are & what’s important to us. Reflecting on the past & experiencing a painful memory helps you understand what you DON’T want. Now you can create the story you do want. Find the blessing in that memory…
- Who are you today because of this?
- What gifts, skills & talents have developed thanks to this experience?
You are who you are today because that experience was a part of your life, a part of who you’ve become & a part of the amazing legacy you leave in the world.
Personal power is a combination of your gifts, skills, talents, your strength, confidence, & competence that you acquired in the course of your experiences. Knowing our personal power means recognizing that we have a heavy effect on our lives. We create the world we live in. To create a better world means shifting our outlook, feeling empowered & rejecting a victimized point of view.
Own it! Value it! Honor it!
Step Two: Repeat Step One!
We can then start to consciously separate from the painful influences from our past & alter our behavior to reflect how we really want to think & feel & how we choose to be in the world! The freedom you will feel within yourself is reward enough however, the universe will give you back the love that you have finally and justifiably started to give yourself. This I promise you!
Ready to dive deeper into self discovery & shadow work? Check out my free webinar Shadow Work 101: Getting to Know Your “Dark” Side
May your dreams be the least that you get!
Love & light,